Down for the Count

I had surgery a little more than an week ago.  I had planned on the surgery knowing that this time of the year is snowy and just not a time when you can get out and play.  Well, silly me!  It has been beautiful weather and I really, really want to go out and play.  That however for the past week or so is a future dream.  When I went into surgery they found a lot more needed to be done and so my healing is going to take 6-8 weeks basically.  I was really hoping to be at least up and going and doing by yesterday as I have a school class that I need to be attending.  Well, hopefully next week because I'm scheduled to teach the class next week.

I was doing good when I came home from the hospital, although I did have a catheter and had to have it for a week.  So when I finally went in to have that removed it was an adventure that I learned from. I drove myself an hour to the doctor's office and then finally got in.  Everything went well and the catheter was removed.  Then they found that I had an infection and so gave me a prescription to fill on my way home.  So I stopped on the way home and had to wait for awhile to get it filled.  When I got back up to the counter, they told me that the insurance wouldn't approve it.  I told them that I would pay for it myself at which time they told me that it would be another half an hour before they would have it ready.  Well, at that point, I just told the lady I would pick it up another time as I was in pain.  I got to the parking lot and into my car and fell apart on the phone to my sweet husband.  I indeed was in pain and I had an hour drive home.  He sweetly called and found out that there had been a misunderstanding with the insurance company and the Dr's office and he got it all worked out.

I made it home, climbed into bed with a pain med and I was done for the day.  Here it is now, 3 days later, and I'm still hurting but determined to be off pain meds.  I haven't had any for 3 days now and I'm doing pretty good.  I went with my husband grocery shopping tonight, but that's as far as it went.  He was sweet enough to stop and get us dinner and then brought me home and he is now putting away the groceries and I'm sitting in a chair with my legs up.  I hope that my days from here on out are better and better and that I won't have anymore of those days where I'm down for the count.   Here's to keeping your fingers cross on that one!

Councel with the Lord in All Thy Doings

How do I describe my feelings this week?  There is so much going on in my life right now.  I have been doing more studying than ever in my scriptures and trying to get a handle on how I can become better, how I can grow to become more like my Savior.

I have to admit that I have had a few meltdowns this week.  I have felt that Satan really does not want me to succeed.  He is trying night and day to discourage me.  And bless my sweet husband, he is so understanding, he helps me gain perspective and is such a great support. 

As this New Year has rolled around I am determined to make my life more meaningful in many different ways.  First off, like everyone else, I want to get healthy.  I have struggled with this for several years.  I was diagnosed with Celiac disease about 8 years ago and once I began eating to heal, I began gaining weight.  I am not so far gone that I can’t change.  Thank Heavens.  But it is a struggle.  Secondly, I want to gain more knowledge.  This is why I am beginning the Pathways program once again.  I need to gain not only secular knowledge, but also I want to grow Spiritually.  Thirdly, I need to continue to magnify my calling as a ward missionary.  This is very intimidating to me.  I'm not the kind of person that can just teach the Gospel at the drop of a hat.

In my reading this morning, I read in Alma 37:37 and it says, “Counsel with the Lord in all thy doings, and he will direct thee for good; yea, when thou liest down at night lie down unto the Lord, that he may watch over you in your sleep; and when thou risest in the morning let thy heart be full of thanks unto God; and if ye do these things ye shall be lifted up at the last day.” 

What a beautiful promise.  I am taking it literally.  I have begun to pray about my diet, my exercise, my studies, and about how I can be of service more to others.  I know that we have to make our own choices, that God will not take our free agency away.  However, I think he does and is willing to inspire us as to things that can help us.  I would go so far as to say that when we counsel with Him, he will even take our temptations away from us so that we have peace and can continue on with our days.

I know I need to repent for the ways in which I have treated my body.  I need to begin to think of it as a Temple that the Lord has given me.  If I take care of it, if I eat right and exercise, read good things and keep my mind on him; then His spirit will have a place to dwell.   

In Alma 38:12  we are taught to bridle all of our passions and to refrain from idleness.  This is something that I need to work on.  I love food.  I freely admit it.  And with all of my children moved out, it is easy to be idle.  There are days when I could just sit and read all day long.  But that won't help me in my goals.  Then in verse 11, we are not to be prideful.  I need to be meek and teachable so that I can learn how to better take care of myself.  I feel that if I do these things and do them in the correct way, I will be able to receive the inspiration that I need to serve others.  To be the daughter Heavenly Father needs me to be.  Then my focus will no longer be inwards, but will move outwards in sharing the Gospel of Jesus Christ in serving my fellowman. 

I am grateful for a loving Heavenly Father.  I am grateful for the scriptures that I can read and glean knowledge from; that they lead and direct me. 

It is a beautiful day ~ life is good!

Learning, Understanding, and Growing

I am beginning or rather continuing a new chapter in my life.  I have gone back to the Pathway's Program that is offered through BYUI.  This is not an easy task for me.  The subjects are things that I have already accomplished at Weber State University in their Math and English Departments.  That being said, I did not have to take an Institute class when I went there and this is an altogether new experience.  I am having to stretch myself mentally and Spiritually.  I think this is a good thing and will be a blessing in my life.

My studies this week have been in the Book of Mormon, in the book of Alma, chapters 30-35.  This is where Alma and his companions go and preach the Gospel of Jesus Christ to those who are dissenters from the Gospel.  This goes along with another thing that I am studying and setting as a goal and that is having Charity in my life.

Alma and his companions loved these people enough that they wanted them to return to the Gospel of Jesus Christ.  I think Alma chapter 32 holds so much meaning - There is a group of people that have fallen away.  And in this group, there is a second group that have helped the others that fell away build Synagogues and places of worship.  This second group is now unable to worship in those same buildings they helped build as they have been cast out as they are poor and are not allowed in.  I love how Alma shows them Charity.  He is not judgmental, he just wants to see them enjoy the blessings that can be theirs if they will learn that they don't have to go to the Synagogues to worship.  They can have a prayer in their hearts at all times.  They can remember their Savior every moment of every day if they so desire, but that is the thing.  This is what they have to desire, then they have to have faith and study the word of God and grow this desire until it becomes a full fledged knowledge of God and what He wants.  Alma is patient in his teaching.  He loves these people.  He loves his companions and is forthright and gentle in his praises of them and also when he reprimands them in their sin and calls them to repentance. 

Alma teaches these people to pray.  Shows them that they can pray at any time and in any place.  I often find myself doing this in my life as I face my daily trials.  My car hears more prayers sent to heaven.  If it could speak, I wonder what it would say. 

We can have constant communication with our Heavenly Father.  He loves us and wants to hear from us.  As a parent I get it.  I love to hear from my children and know how they are doing.  What the problems are that they are facing, their accomplishments, etc.  I think this is how our Heavenly Father is.  I like to think when I do well at something that He is smiling down when I tell him about it.  Likewise, I think His heart breaks when I am struggling and suffering.  He wants to bless us and we have to seek Him to have this happen. 

These are a few of the things that I have studied this week, that I have found an increased understanding in.  I am grateful that I am back learning and in this program that will help me stretch and grow.   I love my Savior, Jesus Christ and look forward to learning and sharing my thoughts each week with you about what I am learning.