So this past week I began doing my homework. It is math. I hate math, I don't understand math. I already did this remedial math a few years ago at Weber State University. So why am I doing it again I asked myself. I'm in tears and full of frustration.
So my husband asked me "Why are you doing this?"
I answered, to get a degree.
HUBBY: Yeah, but why do you need a degree?
ME: So if anything happens to you I have a fall back.
HUBBY: So the life insurance, the 1 year salary from my work and my IRA's wouldn't be enough for you?
ME: Yes they would, but. . .
HUBBY: So why are you doing this to yourself?
It made me take a step back and really look at what I was doing. I have always wanted a degree, but what would it be good for now? Would I ever have a career? No. Would anyone hire me at the age of 56 or 58 when I would finish my degree? No. Are the frustration and tears worth it? No. Will this help our family in any way? No. So I decided to quit. I thought I would feel like a Big Quitter. However, all I really feel is peace. I don't have to worry about getting homework done and having to miss out on family things to get it done. I can now resume my weekly Temple attendance without having to put it off to do homework. I can return to my normal scripture study where I can immerse myself in reading if I want, not because I have an assignment due. I can work on my projects and do those things I love to do now without feeling guilty that I'm not doing homework.
So not I'm not a Big Quitter. I'm a Mover. I am moving on to those things that are better for me and my family now. No I won't ever realize the dream of getting a degree, and that is okay now. I recognize that there are so many other ways to learn. I will still read books and instructions on how to do those projects that I want. I will continue to learn how to cook better and more healthy meals for me and my family. I will continue to learn and grow but in other ways. I am happy with my decision. I am happy with my life.
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