Last night as I layed in bed talking to my husband, I came to realize that even though he is my best friend, I truly need girlfriends!! Bless his heart, he tries, but since moving up here and not having girlfriends around I have come to depend on him more and more. But I miss having someone I can vent to that can sympathizes and understands (how do you vent to your own husband when he's driving you nuts?). Someone I can laugh with until I almost pee my pants, someone I can cry with and it's okay, because it doesn't have to be fixed. Someone that knows exactly what I'm feeling, because she's been there or she's also going through it. Someone that I can go and do girl things with. A friend that will not judge too harshly when I make mistakes, and that will let me love her in return.
We were taking Logan to the airport so he could return to Arizona after selling his car yesterday and we were talking. I noticed that he (my kind husband) kept getting quieter and quieter. Before I knew it, he was asleep and there I was talking away. I had decided yesterday that finally and for reals I'm going back to school. I can't see wasting time just sitting around the house without anything to do anymore. I need to be a force for good in our society and one way to do that is by going back and getting a degree and then moving on. Anyway, I was so excited and I kept going on and on about different things that would change because of this decision. I asked his opinion, like I would have a girlfriend, and he would say "whatever you want" or "why do you need my opinion?" or "do you want me to make this decision for you?". I just needed that sounding board that a girlfriend gives you and no matter how hard he tried (and I know he was doing his best, but) - it wasn't there. I think this is the one thing that I've missed the most because of our move. I had so many dear friends in South Weber I could talk to and I miss you all. Hopefully I will make a close friend soon, but I know that these kinds of relationships take time. But I also know that Heavenly Father knows our needs and I know he will bless me with a dear friend, I just need to be open to others and I will find her.
This was my vent session until I can find a girlfriend to talk to. . . Thanks for your understanding.
1 comment:
I can relate. I meet once a month with a friend from College, and it is a real blessing to know that she has struggles, and her kids are dorky like mine, and that I can share without her fixing anything, and she listens. I don't know what I would do without it. There are so many things we have experienced together. And even here in the ward here are so many friends that I love and a girlfriend is a must! I hope you find one or even more soon.
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